Expressions

Wish i could capture time and hold it in a bottle..........i would freeze it with blink of an eye.....would make time run like a madman......rewind , forward.......sloww, fasssst....aaaaah !!!!!! but alas i know its just a day dream and currently imagining this I'm smiling with mouth open....eyes gazing up in the sky .....and suddenly the shape of my mouth changes and i return back to my normal irritated sad face. :( Life's been throwing me the same question since years with its patient now running out ........and i'm completely lost figuring the statement still. Yes yes yes we should be born with map in hands..... we should be pampered, protected, cared , fought for, sought for..........No matter how much we try to be independent and bold and smart.....inside its a hollow heart craving for some soul to take over............ to just know that somebody is there and aahhh you needn't worry .....but how does one decide that this somebody will stay forever......how doe...

Here I am.....after a long time....on continous pestering from a very dear friend......I decided to come back to some finger excercises ! but what type.....which keystrokes to press....and what memories to register ....I'm completely lost!!! The past year was stupendously happening..(I know it doesn't go here....but i want you to feel the emotion)...my life was like on a stage and went through full on drama....i was all over and i reincarnated........i guess thats an understatement !!! I did everything which i suppose I should have been doing in my college life..........i got young and developed white streaks too.....i got wild and turned sober....i was fragile and at the same time i was cruelly harsh.....i forgave and tried to to forget......i lived ecstasy and somethings inside me died every moment.....In all a rush of emotions.......and the feeling i have right now is unnamed !!!

(21/07/2008):(2:39 PM): The emptiness of thoughts and mind and heart and body and soul......... phew it happened rarely.......... but quite recently this is what i m going through....... a few of my friends commented that my blogs have a sad under tone......... yeah may be ......... that'll pass sooner than later.......... I have been asked by many people mostly old classmates........ "so any bf?" ........... how easily ppl try to intrigue into somebody else's personal lives ........ without even realizing that it is seriously none of their business......... and i have discovered this is what every guy would ask u after some pep conversation ...... just to make sure that "okay lets give it a try" Poor lads !!! What a pity :)

Life's on a new turn now ....... one year since i left this space unattended.......... and whew wat an year it was !!!!! I just learned i somehow aged :O I was talking to my friend few days back and she stated "You know wat amrita........ I finished my college 2 months back and suddenly i feel a sense of responsibility ..... strange naa?" My other friend explained me all this with wat is known as the twenty something dilemma......... things are heavier....... relationships are more important........ duties are more prominent.......... and u are more confused !!!!!!! ........ now i know how people's lives change after 21 !!!!! Am i depressing again ???????/ sorry yaar...... i just can't help being philosophical yaar !! :D Well this year has given me much more trips and adventures than i expected...... some of my close buddies became more closer :) and relationships have made me realize their importance !!! wowo............ nothing more....

Yes this is what i've been through and still in the process from the past 7 months or so .........symptoms??? feeling "not good enough" because one can't find a job that is at one's academic/intellectual level frustration with relationships, the working world, and finding a suitable job or career confusion of identity insecurity regarding the near future insecurity concerning long-term plans, life goals insecurity regarding present accomplishments re-evaluation of close interpersonal relationships disappointment with one's job nostalgia for university , college , high school or elementary school life tendency to hold stronger opinions boredom with social interactions loss of closeness to high school and college friends financially-rooted stress (overwhelming college loans, unanticipatedly high cost of living) a sense that everyone is, somehow, doing better than you Don't worry ..... courtesy wikipedia ...... On a little research I discovered everybody i...

Today was a mind opener for me .......... got to know so many secrets of my school mates..... whom i think of today gives me shivers........ what the hell........ life's really been a change since school.......... the innocence , the charm and the magic of friendship had different meanings then.............there was no pretence ....... no harsh feelings for anybody other than just in like a child's mind .......... but it was a tender age....... ppl were so gullible then tht many of my mates got into bad stuff imagine at the time of school....... ofcourse I was unaware of it until now.......... But yes it was fun spending time with 2 of my oldest buddies on this earth......... spilling beans and gossiping abt other ppl (most fun stuff :P).........But some times It made me uncomfortable when there was PDA between them............... It reminded me of ....

So finally I end my endeavor (a very poor attempt and I realized my potential as a teacher) ........ Meanwhile I got a glimpse of how high the expectation bar is raised for me ...... Though just saved face from the situations turning more ugly...... all's well that ends well ..........NOPE......... all's well that ends anyways :P !!!! and look forward to a new one ........ whooopeeee !!!!! Things getting more fussy with time......... seems this is the first when I m leaving my home ........well not actually.....though it seems ....... to the ugly insensitive bad world of corporate ....... he he......not rhyming !! My nerves getting tense with each passing moment ....... can't help with the anxiety I have .....which is quite peculiar ....... coz considering me being a funloving adventurous type of a person ........ I am so much skeptical abt this software thing ........ hope my future bosses dont come across this :P Well all aside its party time !!!!! get to with a...